bedside pondering

John sleeps on the left side of the bed, I sleep on the right. In the bathroom, John uses the sink on the right, I use the sink on the left. Why?!

I have no conclusion, this is just something that crossed my mind today as I was brushing my teeth. Why do we switch sides?

I wonder if there is any study that talks about what it means to sleep on a certain side of the bed and what's wrong when other "side" things don't reflect that. I'm sure there is. I just need to find it. I am intrigued.

adorable video

My ex-roomie and I used to watch this all the time. It made bad days a little more cheerful. I had almost forgotten about it until I was scrolling through my bookmarks.

Ready for Spring!

I know, who isn't? But really, I am so ready for Spring it hurts. One of the reasons I do not live in Colorado is because I don't think I could handle the winters. Ideally, I would live half of the year in CO and half of he year in North Carolina. Maybe when I'm rich and famous, right? Yeah.

Anyway, I really haven't been myself lately. I am moody and sick and just not motivated. I blame the winter. I was so under the weather still today so I stayed home and rested. And I'm still working my way back to normal. I think the nice weather is helping, but I know it's not going to last so that depresses me. If only the forecast went beyond 10 days so I could see those nice temps on there again. Be spring sang it!

I also blame school for my illness. It is stressing me out big time. I spent far too much time this weekend doing homework. Yes, I enjoyed myself some (woo happy hour and movies) but still, that was all of, 5 hours of my weekend. The rest was reading/writing/etc. I know it's weakening me to be this stressed. So I guess I'm hoping Spring will rejuvenate me and all this work won't be so draining.

Blah.

website link

Well, I wasn't going to put this online yet, but I went ahead and did it. And it turned out ok. Hopefully all the links are still working. Yay web projects! Go visit and explore. For now it's only one poem, but eventually there will be more to see. Piranha Books

ok, so I decided to switch my website to freewebs because it's free, and it has no ads. so the new link is here: Piranha Books

stupid phones

So I can't make outgoing calls on my phone. And I'm sure it's only a matter of time before it is disconnected completely. Not cool. I'm pretty sure I can blame my dad for not giving them any money. Though I pay them, my little brothers' phone is connected to my plan so if he doesn't do the same I get screwed. Just another reason I can be mad at him. I won't get into the logistics of why he still has connections to my plan. But in good news, I will now be resolving this problem. Cause I pretty much need a phone. I just have to find the time to go to Verizon. *sigh*

The Other Boleyn Girl

The Other Boleyn Girl is one of the most amazing books I've ever read. And everyone should love it. I just reread it in anticipation of the movie release, and it was better than I remember. Of course, if you don't enjoy historical fiction you won't like it, but if you do, go read it now!

Basically it's about Anne Boleyn's sister, Mary, and her love affair with Henry VIII. And then Anne's intrusion on that affair. Full of love and deception and Tudor greatness!

Anyway, the movie came out yesterday and I am dying to see it. I have a feeling I will be disappointed. After all, it cannot be anything near what the book is. But, hopefully, I will just enjoy it as a movie and not get upset over the changes. I do now one important thing about the end is changed. But oh well, right? Still so excited!

Ode to Experimental Forms

Yeah, I miss experimental forms today. Twas a wonderful class. So here's a little bit of craziness that I wrote in that class. Enjoy!


2050 the year the oldest legal code was written the Ur-Nammu's Code from before Christ allows for the dismissal of corrupt men protection of the poor giving testimony under oath and the ability of judges to order damages be paid to a victim by the guilty party he enters the bathroom after hearing the toilet flush the stand a foot apart both naked he sees a spot of blood on the floor the effect of the broken lamp they ignored he asks her to come back to bed she remains frozen he apologizes for not using a condom she puts the birth control back in her medicine cabinet

644 the year of parties or religions whatever you choose to call it the new worship practice Tokoyonomushi introduced this year in Japan we now promote worshipping a worm drinking sake dancing in the streets and giving away money

1900 Escalator invented by Charles Seeberger. Paperclip patented by Norwegian Johann Vaaler. Loudspeaker invented by Horace Short. Charlotte Cooper becomes the first woman to win an Olympic gold, for tennis.

969 Earliest recorded mention of playing cards, found in China. Cairo, Egypt, found by Fatimid Dynasty Shiite Muslims.

1920 the year the average lifespan of a human finally exceeded that of a goldfish. first time in recorded history humans lived longer than fish before humans only lived 48.4 years goldfish 50 the time he threw her shirt across the room it landed on the floor without a sound the bra hit the lamp and it fell off the dresser pieces of ceramic scattered on the floor he sucked her breast roughly when she tried to move to clean it

325 in bed, unable to sleep him snoring beside her the sheet barely covering his naked body thinking about her trip to the wine store twelve hours earlier trying to pick out the finest bottle of wine vintage of course to make the night even more special she knew this would be the night that their lives changed also the year the oldest bottle of wine in the world was made found inside a Roman sarcophagus in 1867 having been there at the vineyard since 325 A.D. the two handles form in the shape of dolphins the only bottle that still had the wine inside a silty sediment that hardly seems drinkable after so many years some wine doesn’t get better with age

2000 the year of the pill or something like the pill contraceptives necessary when it comes to one-night-stands or sensual excursions on a luxury boat floating down the Nile crocodile dung was first used by the Egyptians in 2000 B.C. to prevent pregnancy imagine Cleopatra’s men harvesting this from along the banks the crocs watching with their eyes just above the water also the time of night when she decided not to take her pill standing in front of the bathroom sink naked alternating her gaze from her face in the mirror to the tiny pills she would soon flush down the toilet

1350 Drinking chocolate made by Aztecs.

Rocky-the cutest dog ever

So my life is pretty uneventful right now. I can't think of much to write about. So it's puppy time!

This is Rocky, my family's new puppy. Well, he was a puppy when they got him. He's like 6 months old or so now. He's the cutest and sweetest dog I've ever known. Unfortunately he is not mine. So he is far away in St. Louis being cute without me.

Rocky when he first came home:




Rocky when I was home for Christmas:


Rocky now:


Being pretty:


Stealing pillows from my brothers:

The right way to do gravy

So, normally I really hate fast food. But every once in awhile I just crave something. Like right now, I seriously need some biscuits from KFC. Just biscuits really. Though, when I go I will probably get cole slaw too. And in discussing this with John, we have decided that KFC also has some ok mashed potatoes, but their gravy is icky. I don't think I could ever eat KFC gravy again. Well, maybe if it meant money or I had to do it to save my life or something. But it's just not good.

Now what is good is my homemade gravy. It makes me a little angry thinking about it, since my dad taught me to make it. I guess something good did come out of him. We always joked that if some day I were to get fat, we could easily blame it on homemade gravy. It's not really good for you- it's grease from fried chicken, a bit of flour, milk, and salt. Yeah, it's downright bad for you. But oh so good. And I really only make it once a year or so, so I think my otherwise healthy lifestyle can handle it.

This has made me really want to make it. But I think I will just eat biscuits and be merry.

Forty-Nine Percent

The feelings in the poem resurfaced yesterday/today, so I figured it was appropriate. I need to do some revising on it, but here's the original version.

Note: My mother is currently in the middle of a nightmare of a divorce. The "you" in this is my three little brothers ( ages 8, 11, 13) who still live at home and have to deal with it.


Forty-Nine Percent

What would you think if I kidnapped
you? If we left your Mom and
your Dad in Missouri and disappeared
together. I look at the scene

that I have left you in, the scene
our parents have written: you’re
all characters in a Shakespearean tragedy
waiting for the inevitable ending—bodies
strewn across a wooden stage. The guilt

I feel for leaving you there lingers
around me like the cold of winter
at the end of February. When the joy
of snow is gone and all you’re left
with is that fucking bitter wind that bites

flesh off your uncovered face. The only
solution I can see is taking you away
before the curtain falls. Before
they have completely forgotten that it is you

they should be fighting for. You. And not
the destruction of one another. Together
we can leave. We can say “Fuck you!”
to your father: the man who makes

us all feel like we are fish in a tank
full of algae, slowly suffocating
in filth. When you come home

from school I will be waiting
to see your tissue paper butterflies,
to kiss your proud smiles and hold

your small exploring hands. Your father
will not be there with his finger pointed
like a sword, ready to poke through

the innocent insect and say
“Bzzzzzzzzzzzzz! Pop!”
and pronounce your beautiful creation
dead at the scene.
"Fuck you!” to trips to overnight camp

ending with Mom calling the cops
and them meeting her at Quick
Trip where your dad will drop you
off, because he picked you up without

permission and Mom is scared that one day
he really will kidnap you; because forty-nine
percent of kidnappings are committed

by family members of the victims:
mothers, fathers, grandmothers, grandfathers,
aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces, nephews, brothers,

or sisters,

and she's worried he will be the one
to finally take you away, so far she won’t
ever see you again. “Fuck you!”

to the goddamn United States legal
system who listens to every lie
that comes out of his mouth, just because

he is a goddamn Major in the fucking
United States Army. They want to believe
that he is good and honorable and that you

will be safe with him. Because the world
needs heroes and he wears the uniform
that ignorant Americans praise. They would
rather bow down to him and his ridged

rules and regulations then think about
love and commitment. They don’t see
you cry at night, wishing
any of this made sense. Wishing

that you didn’t have to question
if he loves you, if he’ll be there next
week, if he’ll make you feel like
running away, like cutting your wrist.

Wishing that he was still the arms
you remember from years ago. Arms
that held warmth.

What would you say? If I kidnapped
you? What would you think if you knew
I wanted to take you away
and never had the courage?