Crabs!

Yesterday we went over to Kathy and Saureen's for a crab feast!

We got their early since they needed a truck for the table and chairs they retned. That turned into an ordeal, complete with people who were creepy and unhelpful. The boys will never be the same.

As you can see, we love us some crabs!

Saureen and Sameet seasoning the crabs.


Steaming away. "How do you know they're ready?" "When they turn red, you eat."


PJ was not pleased with Victor pounding the heck out of the crab.


Some crabs decided to retain their water.


Craving crabs!

Garden Construction

So you would have thought that after our strenuous hiking on Saturday we would be exhausted on Sunday. But, since we didn't get our Sun morning hike in, as we expected, we had some built-up energy. So when we got home, John suggested we continue work in the yard... aka garden construction. So, we headed to home depot and got to work.

Another trip to home depot and who knows how many hours later, we had a garden. We had 8 foot pieces of wood, so there was some cutting involved (hurray for fancy sawing devices handled by the man because sometimes I do act like a girl). We also had some hard work with the screws that hold all the wood together (boo for not having the right parts to the drill).

We were both sore (from hiking and construction together) by the end of the night, but it was worth it. Too bad it's so late in the season and I can't plant everything I want to plant.

Garden pre-planting.


Pepper plants in their new home


Mutant cilantro...seriously, it's about three times the size it was 10 days ago.


Strawberries, finally with baby fruit. Here's hoping nothing eats them before we do.


My first lily.

Camping at Cunningham Falls

This weekend John and I went camping at Cunningham Falls State Park. This place is only about an hour and a half for us, so it's super convenient (though it took us about 2 hours to get there since we hit some rush hour traffic).

We left Friday and got there around 6:30. We promptly set up our tent since we were expecting rain. We actually had time to gather some wood and have a small fire before we decided to call it an early night. And it didn't start raining until after we had gone to bed. Good timing on our part. As we lay in bed listening to the rain, we contemplated whether there was enough room in this tiny tent for a dog. It was determined on Saturday night, when we somehow scooted ourselves all the way to the edge of the tent, that there is indeed room for a dog.

It ended up being freezing that night, despite it being July. So we had to use our padding as blankets, making the night rough. But it was survivable.



Saturday we were up at the crack of dawn. We ate some yogurt and cliff bars and headed to the trail. First we walked down to the lake. It was so early that no one was there. Except the "water ninjas" who were actually military, we believe, but sounded like ninjas at first. Anyways, they were doing their exercises in the lake. So funny.



We wandered around down there for awhile, since it wasn't crowded yet. We went off the regular trail and just followed the edge of the lake for awhile. We found some fishing line, but no fish. We also found some odd berries, which we did not eat.



We then went back to our original trail, but went the other way towards the falls. This was supposedly the easy route, but there were some steep parts. The falls weren't too impressive, probably because it's been so dry, but it was still nice. we climbed around on the rocks some and just relaxed before heading back up the mountain. A lot of steep areas! We figure the campsite to the lake, to the falls, and back to the campsite was about 2 miles, but it wasn't all marked so we weren't sure.





When we got back to the campsite it was only 10:30, but we went ahead and ate lunch! It was a strenuous morning and we were starving. So we had sandwiches, potato salad, and chips and lots of Eating Right water. Then we took a lovely nap.

After our nap, we took the trail back to the lake, thinking there was another trail down there. There wasn't. We wandered around the other side of the lake and didn't find anything, so we headed back up the mountain. Since we were not going to the falls, we went the same way we came, which was steeper so by the time we were finished, we were tired. But my legs and butt are in great shape now!

We took another nap (yay naps!) and then took a stroll to explore the other campgrounds. Then we started gathering wood for the evening. We had a nice big pile, which was good because we had a fire going for a good number of hours.



We cooked our chicken over the grill and had dinner. Then there were smores, plain toasted marshmallows, and John even melted some chocolate and made chocolate covered strawberries (my favorite!).

We stayed up later that night (probably because of all the naps) but still not too late. But we had a large pile of ash by the night's end. Hey, it was really cold, I had to stay warm.

We got up this morning and packed up. We wanted to find another trail and do that before leaving, but the park was uncooperative. Apparently they only tell you were the falls/lake trails are. All the rest you have to buy a trail guide for. We could have found some ourselves but it was a pain, and some trails were across the highway at another park, so we gave up and just came home.

But, the weather was cool, the food was great, hikes were tiresome but we both loved it, we had nice campfires and some good quiet time. Just don't ask John to comment on our neighbors and their annoying kids :)

He listens!

You know, you always hear sob stories about men and their inability to listen. And, yes, John has had is moments. But, I also know that most of the time he does listen, and does what he can if a response is needed.

So I have my little "garden" going on on the back deck. And I've been saying for probably the last month that I really need to move some of these plants out of the pots and into a real garden. I started everything from seeds or bulbs, in pots since they were so very fragile for awhile, but they are getting too big for their little homes. I moved the lilies to the front garden a few weeks ago, but there was no where to put any non-flower plant. It would be kind of weird to be growing bell peppers in the front yard.

Problem is our backyard is a disaster. I think only 10% is grass right now. There's moss and weeds and a big pile of cedar chips that was once the mulch out front. There was even a tree growing in our fence. So yeah, wild. There were also two very large rubbermaid containers that the previous owner set up. And those were in the sunniest part of the yard, where any garden should be.

So bottom line, I needed John to help me out a bit with making the yard garden ready. I can do quite a lot, but it would have taken me a really long time on my own.

I started working on the moss problem on Friday-tore a bit up and began an experiment with some grass seed (it's supposed to grow in the shade, which is good since half the yard is shady since it's under the deck. perfect spot for moss, obviously). Anyway, I didn't get very far on Friday, mostly because I was wanting to experiment with whether the seed would work before going all crazy with grass.

So today my wonderful boyfriend got motivated to build me a garden. I helped, of course. And actually, we didn't build a garden, but we are on our way. We had some major work to do with the rubbermaid containers. One was full of dirt, who knows why, and had become an ant farm. It was disturbing. The other was full of cobwebs. So we cleaned those out and moved them to a different part of the yard. We also got rid of all the mulch and weeds. And we did the general planning for where the garden will be, raised bed versus ground level, what to do about rabbits, what else we want to plant, etc. So yeah, I have this very nice open area ready for construction!

John also killed a snake for me, so I was not eaten.

PS: right after complaining about my plants not being edible, I discover not one but 4 blossoms on my strawberry plants. So I will hopefully get at least something from them!

Back to fiction writing

I started working on my novel again today. It's been on the back burner while I finished the poetry book and then while I regrouped after school ended. But it's July now and if I want a draft by the end of the year, we best get working. (That was my goal, it seems doable, 6 months, leaves no more than 50 pgs a month, ish.)

So Ainsley (main character) and I are getting reacquainted. I have to say, so far, she's much more exciting than she used to be. I was having a real problem with her before. Other characters were just so much cooler. And really, one character will probably always be my favorite. But at least Ainsley isn't boring any more. She drinks only Australian wines.

This is the first sentence:

It’s a little-known fact that while serving in the Civil War Ulysses Grant fell in love with a whore.


PS: Speaking of wines, I've been thinking of starting another blog for wines. I don't drink much anymore, but have really wanted to explore wine more. Especially after listening to NPR on my birthday-they were talking about American wines. Every state now has at least one winery. How great would it be to have a wine from every state? I don't know that I would offer much besides me liking or disliking a wine, and probably tell the tale of what I did the night I drank it. I have no desire to sit and talk about the subtle flavors or whatever really cool wine people do. But it's something I think I may explore. I just now have to force myself to stop buying the wines I know I love and be adventuresome.

Plants!

The other day I was in an "I want" mood. But when I started to blog about it, I sounded really whiny and selfish. So, we'll stick with just one thing from the list...

I want to eat my plants!

This sounds scary, but most of them are edible. Or, will be. There's herbs, strawberries and peppers. But for some reason, no matter how crazy the strawberries get, there just isn't any fruit happening. It may just need more time, but I want to eat strawberries. I know the peppers need more time, but again, same thing.

I'm afraid I forgot how to be patient this week.

One of the lilies in the front yard. It has buds, so hopefully we get flowers soon!



Baby pepper plants, which are all leaves and no vegetables.


Unidentified herb. It might be basil. I had a small issue with not labeling my seeds and then mixing it all up.


The lone surviving cilantro. I don't know what happened to the rest.


Strawberries...getting huge but there's no sign of fruit.

Birthday Recap

I am 25, which according to my 13-19 year old selves, will be the greatest year of my life. I once figured 25 was a good age since you were out of school, probably in a good relationship (or old enough to realize a relationship wasn't everything) old enough to be have or be getting close to a great job, etc. Basically, 25 seemed to be when all the happy adult things really started to settle in. My younger self had so many dreams for being 25! Don't know if I still agree, but we shall see. I don't imagine it will be bad, so it should be a good year.

Anyway, for the birthday:
margaritas on Thursday
lazy Friday with John complete with a nap and Bride Wars
Saturday with the Cookseys: a walk with John, sister, baby, and two dogs to see the grandparents, a nice present to come (they're framing my diploma), watching John scoop up a baby in his arms and twirl her in the air, Trace Adkins (nice long hair, some funny songs, also a womanizer (boo)), baby dancing to music, fireworks in the arms of my love, scary drunk driver on the way home who did not swerve as we passed him!
another lazy day on Sunday, though I started to get back to my scrapbooks. (so behind!)

Ok, Death, we get the point

I don't care much about all these celebrity deaths, but it's getting a bit out of hand. Add on to that, the personal deaths this week and it's just scary. I'm pretty darn happy to be alive at this point.

A woman from my old church lost her brother this week. They had to take him off life support, so it was really rough.

There was also a plane crash in Arkansas, full of people from Missouri. 3 people died, two survived (so far). The one boy was the brother of one of Evan's (my brother) friends. One boy was a freshman at SLUH, where Evan is going to high school next year. That boy's father also died. All three of my brothers knew them.

So, no more sadness would be nice.

This has nothing to do with death, actually the very opposite, but-- I just found out about another pregnancy. Well, I found out last weekend but didn't want to talk about it. This baby has caused many conversations between John and I about people and why they have kids, and what it means to the rest of their lives. I know, when/if we have kids, our lives will still be great. Any grandparent would happily take our kids so we can still go out, and more importantly, still take a vacation just the two of us. Yeah, it's different, but I think we would be really good at not letting our friends be forgotten and not losing the romance. Some couples, it seems, have a harder time with this. And once that first kid arrives, they only have friends with kids or no friends at all. And are totally absorbed with the parenthood thing.

I guess this is all kind of annoying in that I am still so young. (with my birthday around the corner, I may forget that...25 is a crazy age!...but really, I am) I am not yet to the point where I want kids, I still want to be having a good time, solo. (or with John/friends, you get the point) But so many of our friends are in their early thirties, so it's not surprising that they are ready to start their families.

And along those same lines... I really need to figure out how to make more friends. I've always done it through school, and I don't have that any more. And all the friends we have now were first John's friends. This goes along with my need to get out and do more things. I think I may venture to the library's book club one of these days. And see what other groups there are around here. Maybe take canoeing lessons... not that it's hard, but it's a way to get into the "club". Still pondering that.

On a more positive note, I just had a very nice walk around the neighborhood. It started to sprinkle at the end, but that was actually very light, so it was pleasant.

I also made banana bread again. And it is delicious.

I had a small case of the travel bug earlier, and I decided that Washington state would be a very nice place to go. I was fascinated by pictures of one of the state parks. So I started looking into cabins and such that were nearby (since we all know, I like to plan random vacations). Anyway, one of the closest towns to this park is Forks, which is where Twilight is set. I immediately groaned. Then, on the main page of their website it says "Home of Twilight!" And one of the lodges has a Twilight package, complete with a map you can follow to trace the steps of the characters. That kind of turned me off to Washington temporarily. Though, I know I will go sometime, just won't dare stay in that town, or at that lodge.

I also decided that next time I plan a vacation, I'd like it to be more than just me and John. We go to the beach with his friends every year. I'd like to rent a large cabin with a bunch of my friends. So, if you're interested, sometime in the next few years, we need to plan a great vacation!

Crappy Week Turned Good?

So I thought the week was going well. On Tuesday I went down to D.C., to the Department of Homeland Security, for "Take Your Child To Work Day". It was pretty great showing the kids our magazine. I went with them to the presentation on border patrol dogs, and got to see two very cute puppies. All of this for work.

But then I learned that I was basically being forced to join the new project management team. This means no more editing. Since I was hired to be an editor and want to be an editor, this isn't exactly my idea of a fun job. Though everyone knows I am super organized, so I do make a good manager. I don't want to really go into details. The powers that be are trying to make it seem like I was given a choice in the matter, and that this is what's best for my career. But that's all ridiculous. So who knows what lies ahead with the job.

Anyway, I was stressed out and really upset all Weds/Thurs. And I had a lot left to edit on this book, that I just really wanted to finish. So I was not in a good mood.

So Friday I edited, then went to buy a tent (since we're planning our first camping trip!), and planted my lilies out front. Then I had my monthly massage, came home and had a nice dinner and watched Desperate Housewives for a few hours. All nice and calming, and John's been super understanding of my crappy mood.

Then today my graduation/birthday present arrived...a new laptop! So my mood is improving. (Actully FedEx tried to deliver it yesterday, literally 5 minutes after I left for my massage. Why did I not leave 5 minutes later?)

We have a BBQ tonight, which will probably be good... unless I get annoyed. We'll see. I will bring wine, I think.

More on Marriage

Warning: Not all of this makes sense unless you're in my head. I have trouble really explaining what I think when it comes to this topic.

If you've been around me... well ever... you probably have at least some sense about my feelings on marriage. To summarize: I'm not against marriage, but I don't think it's necessary.

Well, the more I think about it, the more reasons I have to not be married. Lately, I've been very against large weddings and the stress and cost, etc. I mean, take a look at my family at any one holiday/celebration in the last year and you're probably understand me not wanting them all in the same room. I always run interference, but I would not want to do that on my wedding day.

But that's a rant for another time.

Today, I am anti-marriage because of the government's ability to control it. There are many subcategories under this broad idea, but for now, my rant is spurred by this article.

To summarize: PA has two marriage licenses. One for those getting married by an officiant, one for those doing a "self-uniting" ceremony (which sounds fun, btw).

Well, there's become some issues in that people have become less religious and don't always want a religious ceremony. In which case, they can under the first license just get married by a judge. But, more and more people have turned to getting friends/family ordained online. Something that is now being challenged.

A ruling in 2007 said that "ministers ordained online were not authorized to conduct weddings because they did not have established congregations and church buildings."

This is what set me off.

The government is granting certain rites to those who get legally married. So, they do have some rights to decide what it means to be married. I agree that random people off the street can't just marry you, or it's not legal. But where do we draw the line in what the government can dictate and what we want to decide for ourselves about our lives.

I think my big issue is that this statement gives cult leaders more rights to marry people than some others. A minister ordained online did go through training, should know laws etc. In my opinion, they are schooled enough to be given the right to legally marry people. But, we will take away this right from them not because they don't have the education, but because they don't have followers or a church?

So then someone who starts a cult-as long as they have x-number of people and a building that they meet in, can marry as many people as they want-and they will be legally valid. Even if this person has no education whatsoever in marriage law, they can go ahead and do it.

So what I'm really saying is that there needs to be a distinction between church and state-an ongoing problem for me. If you want a legal marriage, then you get it done by a government official. If you want a religious marriage, go to your priest or minister. They are two completely different things. That's my new stance-if you want both, you get to have two ceremonies. Or, you just pick the one you want. But if you're married by a church, you only get the perks of being married under that religion. You cannot get all the government perks until a judge or statesman marries you.

This is the problem with gay marriage in our country, people confuse legal marriage with religious marriage. But again, a rant for another day.

Now, I actually don't think a legal marriage is necessary at all and if I say I am in a relationship, I should get any perks that people who marry get, but I will grant the government the right to do their thing because that's just the way it is. And I currently don't have the power to change it. I'm not going to get married just to get health insurance. I think if both parties agree to a "spouse" status, you should get that coverage regardless of a piece of paper. But that's not going to change any time soon, so I will just choose to forgo that. I could just get married and get all those "perks" but I choose not to. I get that.

USAA has it partially right though. John and I ran into a problem when we went to Colorado. I was told he could be added to our rental car for no fee because he was my "spouse". We just had to prove that we lived together. So I got my Maryland license and all that jazz so we had the same address. But the rental car people wouldn't add him because we weren't married. (which, btw, was stupid because they couldn't prove we weren't married based solely on the fact that we had different last names, since plenty of women don't change their names now.) Anyway, after the trip I argued with USAA and the rental car company and now have a nice piece of paper stating their policy on a spouse. Which is not defined only by a legal or religious marriage, but includes same-sex partners, and people living together. Basically, if you consider yourself a couple, you are one.

At least in terms of renting a car. I still haven't fought to get John a bank account, as my spouse. Not sure what they'll think about that.

Quote of the day: I don't want my life to be dictated by what other people think.

So yeah, don't expect wedding invites any time soon.

PS: I tried to find something corrupt about Maryland's marriage laws. I was annoyed that the license fee varies between counties and that you must marry in the county you get your license from, but this is just priceless:

Maryland does not have common-law marriage or same-sex marriage, but you can marry your cousin. How fucked up is that?